I am Karan from Olympia, WA. Almost every other name used here is a pseodonym pseudonim pseudonymn alias. The rest of it is true - mostly - and all of it is my own. Don't even think about taking any of it, unless of course, you want to pay me.

Random Wisdom: Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed. - George Burns

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  • The counter says that 4291267 have been flummelized, but I personally think it's all a big lie.

    om namay padmay om

    [ Friday, January 17, 2014 ]

    I haven’t been able to put my finger on it…

    I’ve been in a funk...unable to figure out what it is that sent me there. I’ve wallowed in it, trying to think my way out of it.  It’s all a process, don’t you know.

    My way of moving onward is to examine what’s up and once I figure it out, I feel like I can just get on with my own self and leave that all behind me.

    I think I’ve finally figured it out.  I think I’m feeling a bit of grief for the loss of the life I expected to be leading at this point in my life.  I expected to be living and enjoying my late middle ages with Leonard...finding a simpler existence and looking forward to a formal retirement.  Instead, we’ve spent the last 5+ years worrying about money, supporting our grown kids as they move in and out of our home, welcoming a grandson and feeling a mountain of disappointment in most of those efforts and experiences.

    One of my favorite hokey homilies is a Yiddish one: “Man plans and God laughs.” And sometimes I need to remember that my own ability to rebound and exercise my flexibility is to understand that just because I was dreaming of a certain outcome doesn’t mean that it will happen. 

    Once I came to that realization, I slapped my forehead and have now decided to move on.  Plus...I remembered that this place is where I air out my brain and reach these realizations sooner.

    I am back.

    Posted by karan on 01/17 at 11:23 AM
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