I am Karan from Olympia, WA.
Almost every other name used here is a
pseodonym pseudonim pseudonymn alias.
The rest of it is true - mostly - and all of it is my own.
Don't even think about taking any of it, unless of course, you want to pay me.
Random Wisdom: Adventure is worthwhile - Aesop
The counter says that 3628817 have been flummelized, but I personally think it's all a big lie.
[ Friday, February 28, 2014 ]
I think I’ll go clamming this weekend. I’ll buy long rubber waders and a clamming shovel and get up at dawn and go out to the beach and freeze my ass off and dig and dig my version of supersonic speed to catch one of the little slimy critters and try not to cut off my toes in the process and then I’ll go home with 3 clams in my bucket with sand in every crevice and hole in my body. Or...I’ll go to the fish store and buy a whole bag of them for about $10. Or not. I don’t even like clams. Nevermind.
[ Wednesday, February 19, 2014 ]
I think I knew it on some level but now that it’s personal, it pisses me off.
I think I knew it on some level but now that it’s personal, it pisses me off...but getting old sucks. It’s not the increasing creaks and groans. It’s not the increasing need to make to do lists. It’s actually the ever increasing dismissal showered on me by younger people. At first I thought it was a matter of heightened or maybe even excessive sensitivity to slights and glaze-overs when I talk to someone younger than me. I began to notice that sales people increasingly overlook my polite conversation and sometimes even seem annoyed with me for my words. I notice that when I volunteer, I am given chores instead of responsibilities and I notice, most sadly of all, that I am no longer considered as a valuable contributor to this world.
This didn’t just start when I let my hair go to its natural silvery color...it’s been going on for as long as my face started drooping. I kind of understand why folks look into lifting and tucking...although I WILL NOT DO THAT!
There are some kindnesses showered on me because of my 58 years...for instance recently a young woman made an effort to help me take my suitcase out of the overhead bin on a plane...an effort I appreciated before I realized why she did it....hey...I’m not old! I do qualify for some of those old lady discounts which I’m glad to take until they started getting applied automatically. I am certain that I’ll not get another job reflecting my training and experience and at best, if I need it, I’ll be looking at greeting at Walmart or sweeping floors at McDonalds. I don’t mind that kind of work...well I do but I’m not in a position to have to do it, thank god! But I don’t understand why all the respect I formerly enjoyed disappeared when my uterus dried up because if truth be told I put my uterus on hold a long long time ago.
[ Thursday, January 23, 2014 ]
college is expensive
My friend Shelley shared this Facebook post by Robert Reich. It reminded me of some quiet thoughts I’ve long kept to myself....and allowing for the recognition that college is proportionately much more expensive then ever… many students don’t engage in some obvious cost saving measures that were once considered to be expected “in the day” and know that I write this from first-hand experience in speaking with students.
Students don’t/won’t share a bedroom. They don’t want to use a laundromat. Many “can’t” live without a car. A study abroad experience is a must have...etc.
Now I’m not such an ogre to suggest that all needy students demand these things...just that I’ve had conversations with very needy students who have taken out student loans to avoid and benefit such privileges...and who have been incensed that I might suggest living more frugally to avoid the debt. In my mind it’s a matter of living cheaper now or later...with loan payments that prevent car or home ownership. Too often students seem not to believe that they live with less and keep an eye on the prize.
There. I’ve said it aloud and yes...I know tuition and books are outrageously high costs.
[ Wednesday, January 22, 2014 ]
Verizon killed the internet
From the New Yorker: “Since 1970 or so, carriers like A.T. & T. and Verizon have been barred from blocking or degrading whatever is transported over their lines. Although, at the time, the rule primarily concerned long-distance voice calls, that principle, applied to the Internet, has become known more recently as net neutrality. It offers a basic guarantee: that content providers on a network—whether it be YouTube, Wikipedia, or bloggers—can reach their users without worrying about being blocked, harassed, or forced to pay a toll by the carrier. Policing that rule in its various guises has been a core mission of the Federal Communications Commission for the past four decades—and keeping carriers away from Internet content has been among the F.C.C.’s most successful policy initiatives since its creation, in 1934. It is the Magna Carta of the Web; today, there’s not a tech firm or a blog that doesn’t owe something to the open, unblocked Internet....”
This isn’t such good news.
[ Friday, January 17, 2014 ]
Obama and the NSA
I haven’t written here for a long time. It doesn’t mean I haven’t had a thought or two about what’s gone on around me, just that I ignored here.
So...with the NSA and all this phone call, email and cell phone spying…
I had mixed feelings when this whole NSA is spying on us thing unfolded. My first thought was duh...didn’t the Bush administration make this legal after 911? Like who assumed they weren’t doing just this? My contrary thought was what a bunch of assholes work for our government/ are our government.
The second thought I had was that Snowden was a baby and his revelations bordered on traitorous. Mostly I thought he was amazingly naive.
Finally, I figured that this was something we were all going to have to live with and if I had any intention of going subversive, I’d have to learn to watch me and my big mouth.
Today, Obama released his plan to make this whole NSA spying thing seem not so bad. Yeah. He’s out in a couple of years and who knows who or what will undo anything he sets in motion today. One of his plans is to take the government out of the business of storing all this electronic data they collect. Not that they’ll stop it, just that (I guess) they’ll contract it out to (what I hope) is a trustworthy citizen corporation...you know, like Blackwater.
I’ve seen enough of those doomsday movies to realize that I don’t necessarily want to put my trust in some private hands. Seems to me that we’ll have even less protection there.
I guess that I’ll have to begin to practice my subversive privacy efforts starting now. Or yesterday.
I haven’t been able to put my finger on it…
I’ve been in a funk...unable to figure out what it is that sent me there. I’ve wallowed in it, trying to think my way out of it. It’s all a process, don’t you know.
My way of moving onward is to examine what’s up and once I figure it out, I feel like I can just get on with my own self and leave that all behind me.
I think I’ve finally figured it out. I think I’m feeling a bit of grief for the loss of the life I expected to be leading at this point in my life. I expected to be living and enjoying my late middle ages with Leonard...finding a simpler existence and looking forward to a formal retirement. Instead, we’ve spent the last 5+ years worrying about money, supporting our grown kids as they move in and out of our home, welcoming a grandson and feeling a mountain of disappointment in most of those efforts and experiences.
One of my favorite hokey homilies is a Yiddish one: “Man plans and God laughs.” And sometimes I need to remember that my own ability to rebound and exercise my flexibility is to understand that just because I was dreaming of a certain outcome doesn’t mean that it will happen.
Once I came to that realization, I slapped my forehead and have now decided to move on. Plus...I remembered that this place is where I air out my brain and reach these realizations sooner.
I am back.